I walked away clutching my boyfriend’s hand.

When the woman standing across the stall from me at the Saturday farmers' market asked if I was having a boy or a girl, I so badly wished I could say, “Yes, I can’t wait to meet my new daughter.” Instead, I felt my cheeks redden, my eyes cloud and my hands let go of the items I was going to purchase.

Strangers Assuming My Endometriosis Belly Is Pregnancy Hurts Me Deeply

“It looks like your womb is inhospitable,” she said, “but there’s always IVF if you want to give pregnancy a go.” And with that, she was gone, leaving the images on my bedside table and wishing me a speedy recovery, saying we’d meet again to review in six months time. After coming round from surgery, high on IV morphine and still in excruciating pain, my surgeon showed me images of the inside of my womb covered in black speckles: the endometriosis. This was left untouched during surgery as a bowel specialist is required to be in the operating theater for its removal, as it’s deemed a higher-risk procedure. In my surgery, they also found four centimeters of endometriosis covering my bowel. Endometriosis affects one in ten people who menstruate, but the number of patients far outweighs medical professionals trained in the specific treatments we need. This is a rare occurrence in endo surgery, particularly if the operating team lacks specific experience, which is common. Through sheer luck, and a lot of skill on the surgeon’s part, they removed it without having to take my ovary too. Although I would happily have one of my own now, my partner and our current life setup say otherwise, but there is also the larger issue that I probably can’t have them anyway.ĭuring the operation where my endometriosis was diagnosed, the doctors also found a golf-ball-sized cyst on my ovary. I’ve worked with children in various capacities over the years, and whether teaching or nannying, I find caring for children to be incredibly fulfilling. I’ve always wanted tham, and I have a kind of innate feeling inside me that says I’d be good at mothering. Having my bloating mistaken for a baby bump has left me feeling ashamed about the way my body looks to others, but I’m more heartbroken by the knowledge that having a child of my own is a reality I will most likely never experience. The Worst Part of My Endo Diagnosis Is That I May Not Be Able to Have My Own Children Often it makes people with severe endometriosis look like we may be carrying a child.

A hallmark of both IBS and endometriosis is extreme bloating and swelling of the stomach caused by an inflamed abdomen, along with digestive issues that are intensified by the presence of the cells causing the enlarged stomach. In my case, they found extensive “deep infiltrating” cells growing in the lining of my stomach, which has contributed to intense gastric issues that were formerly misdiagnosed as IBS. The most notable are reduced fertility and the inability to have children biologically.Įndometriosis has been found on the lungs, brain and liver. It’s a full-body disease that is often misinterpreted and dismissed as “hormones” or “bad periods,” but its effects reach far wider than just bleeding. I live with stage-four endometriosis, diagnosed through surgery earlier this year after ten years of extremely heavy periods and debilitating pain. Still, in the past three months, I’ve been approached twice by people asking when I’m due. As society becomes more aware and accepting of the reasons why women can’t or don’t want to have children-whether for personal, political or environmental reasons-it’s become increasingly taboo to ask someone if they are pregnant.

Endo belly bloating